It's a new year and a new/fresh start for everyone.
Or it is just another day and we put value to the
time we spend with our lives. Either way, change
is always good and some time it is needed. This
year, I will def spend money on things that are
needed, less materialistic though the economy
wants those types of consumers who blow
their money on the wants instead of the needs.
Screw the economy though, if it fails - then it fails.
Though it does delay my academic career at the
moment with the budget cuts and layoffs, it is hard
to get the class/professor I want/need. It is a new year
so some self-growth/maturity is a must. I've noticed
I have been extra friendly than normal, so establishing
a closer connection with those in my life is a good thing
to work on also. I am thinking of starting on my project
that I have been contemplating about for some time now.
We'll see if I will pull the trigger which will be tomorrows'
entry.

I thought about death the other day.  Again it fears me.  It has been a long while since I have given though about it.  There are times when I just accept it and it keeps me from ever thinking about it again.  But here I was, laying down, late after midnight, and it just bugged me; creating this hollowness within me that it sort of hurt.  Everything dies, nothing last forever.  Life is here one minute and gone the next.  Life is priceless.  If we truly value our lives, we would not be so careless in the things we do.  But that doesn't mean we should lock ourselves inside a room.  Experiencing and interacting is the enjoyment, a part of the meaning of life, in my opinion.  I think it is my greed for life that makes me fear death.  It always brings up the same question, "what comes after?" I envision just darkness and life moves on without me. Sometimes I like to toy with the thought of reincarnation, with my consciousness still intact so I can gain more knowledge and wisdom.  Like the characters of Highlander, though they are immortal, it would be good and bad to live so long.  Then there is the "after life", where I join many others but then what? What are we doing in this area of heaven or hell, would that not be sort of living again but not really with the ones you want to be with?  Then there is the thought of losing others.  Life is so precious and delicate.  There are many people in my life that I wish I not see go.  I like to end this entry with a quote I had in my previous entry. Sorry my entries are so short but they're just expressions of what I am thinking or feeling at the moment or for the day.

"You have to know the answer to this question, if you died right now, how would you feel about your life?"